Recovery

Keep going!

I have been re-reading my old journals, & recently, I read that we moved into our 1st home in Indy on March 16, 1996. To me, our life alone finally started that day.   Ironically, 8 years later, I had my stroke on that same day (March 16, 2004), & our life “began” again!  What is it with March 16? J  Hopefully, that day will no longer mark any kind of “new” beginning! (no pun intended!)

13 years ago, the doctors said that I’d never speak again w/o the aid of a machine, or computer–the doctors would see a hopeless case, so that is what they presented: a hopeless case.  I could have given up right there: I had a “get out of jail free card”, but there was NO WAY I was resorting to that kind of life!  I believe I have mentioned before, how there was NO WAY I’d spend my life talking through a machine, like the doctors said I would, & I was determined to prove them wrong!   I believe that my abilities now, reflect on the attitude I had: I had hope, & eventually I saw potential, so God has blessed me to “tap in” & find that potential that I hoped was there… For 10 years or more, I saw very slow progress, but I’m OCPD (OCD-personality), so if I am faced with a problem, I can’t stop until it’s fixed!  Ha!  Ha!  So, I kept pushing–I wouldn’t give up…& when I finally saw more results, I actually tried harder!  I eventually became confident enough to talk to strangers, & even bring up new topics & ask odd questions, THROUGH MY SPEECH!   I never thought I took for granted the ability to call to someone down the hall…but I get SOOOO excited now when I am in my craft room, & can call down to one of the girls in the kitchen, & they not only hear me, but  understand me, as well!!!  It is SO awesome!  I can appreciate it more, now…but, I could not appreciate it, if I had not ever experienced being w/o it!

However I know that now, while it is tempting to “take a break” & get lazy, I can’t, & must remain vigilant!  When I 1st had my stroke, my left arm seemed to have a little more movement back then , but I got lazy, & when my left arm was showing progress in my shoulder, what did I do?  I strapped it down & reverted to the bare minimum of therapy that I needed for it…

But if I give in & get lazy, I’ve learned that God ALWAYS finds a way to make something negative turn positive. (Though it’s better & easier if I don’t get lazy!)   In this case, the movement my left arm gained in my shoulder is still there, but weaker.  It’s up to me to get it back to where it was.  However, I’d never unstrap my arm!  It is essential to keeping me in my chair when I laugh/sneeze, it helps me to balance, & it offers me so much independence (like when I reach far down to grab something, I stay in my chair).  All the independence I am discovering couldn’t happen unless: a. both hands worked, or b. my hand was strapped down.  I could have tried for a (& with hard work, I like to think it’s still a possibility), but I got lazy, & chose b.  B wasn’t necessarily the best choice.  (When God gives u a break, the better choice is to work hard so u don’t let go!)  But if u “let go,” God will let u repent, & make the most of what is left.  I hope I don’t “get lazy” this time, & I look forward to what the next year brings, as I continue on this journey in my life.

“I am freakin old!”

I recently ran across this video that shares my religious beliefs, & I thought was neat, & wanted to share:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W5xnJU0-N58

It occurred to me that things I’d normally blog about, I have written to my son on his mission instead, so I need to “catch u up.”  For instance, I never mentioned a big milestone: that I got a PHONE!  Yes, u read that correct: I got a PHONE!  An iPhone to be exact…it’s pretty cool!  My eyes still have double vision, but I assume the eye muscles have gotten stronger so my eyes line up better & I can read smaller font…Pretty cool!  I never thought I’d be able to see or speak well enough to have a PHONE!

My phone is really more for texting, but I can do phone calls (preferably Facetime, so u can see my mouth, but I have done a few calls on speakerphone!).  I can type on it, but it’s tough.  So, it’s synced w/my iPad, where I can respond to texts.

The hardest part is hearing it ring, & NOT ignoring it, because ever since 2004, I have been ignoring phone calls!  The 2nd hardest part is finding it in my wheelchair bag!  (My phone is not big & easy to find, like my iPad!  & my wheelchair bag has gotten bigger, so I’m like an old lady frantically feeling around my bag/purse, for my phone!)

Anyway,this last week, it suddenly became tough to read my texts—whether it was on my iphone or my ipad…so I went to the eye doctor, & I am officially old: I need bifocals…My shirt today agrees: instead of reading, “I am freakin cold”, it reads, “I am freakin old!”

2017-01-10-08-05-13

Tuesdays Rock!

The day of the week that I am grateful for is Tuesday: on Tuesday I get to do my favorite therapy–horse therapy, I get to hear from my son on his mission (it makes me so happy!), & I get to spend time with my husband (usually a lunch date, but it may include going places together). It is by far the best day of my week!

Speaking of horse therapy, when I started it, I got so tired from the workout, that it wiped me out the entire day!  Unfortunately, I can’t sleep in the daytime, but once I had the strength to lift my iPad, I’d just sit & listen to an audio book.  My horse therapy days quickly became my “audio books day”, cuz that was all I could do!

However, last year, I discovered the secret to regain my strength: don’t know if u’ve ever seen the cartoon of Popeye, the Sailor Man (I swear he’s in toonland at Universal, & he’s on you-tube). Anyway, I used to laugh at how when Popeye was tired, or getting beat up, he’d find a can of spinach, eat it, & his muscles popped out & he re-gained his strength—all from a little can of  spinach!  It seemed ridiculous!  But I found out there may be truth to it, cuz my green supplement (that has spinach in it) really does make me stronger!

I believe that cartoon was created with a stroke victim in mind: spinach not only helps him, but he also can’t seem to use a side of his face, & talks pretty bad, like me!  And if u want to hear what I mean, here I am, counting as I do knee bends on the tilt table:

https://youtu.be/VSICDo7oJmw

blessings

I heard this song a few years ago, & it has become a favorite…just wanted to share

https://youtu.be/XQan9L3yXjc

Often, my blessings & “tender mercies” are so small when they come, I do not see them until they start to pile up.  In fact, I can’t tell u how often I think things, & think, “now how am I going to share that?!?”–& then someone says it for me!

Horse Therapy

Just sharing: In a little over a week, I am starting horse therapy again!  I’m sooo excited!  Horse therapy is out every summer, & my core gets weaker during those months, so I can’t wait to start back!  (It was at the Abilities Convention that I learned how to find horse therapy: I was told to google/look up something like ””professional association of horsemanship international PATH international equine therapy””.)

About 4 years ago, before I started horse therapy, I checked out standing w/c (wheelchairs). It was awful, because I needed re-adjusting once I stood, so not only was it uncomfortable, but I also needed so much help to stand that I lost what little independence I had!  Standing felt a chore, & not fun at all!

When I tried the standing chair this summer, it was a 100% different experience!  My core was SO much stronger, so there was no re-adjusting needed. If I get a sanding w/c, I could actually use the feature of standing to stand up whenever I want to, & drive around!  The idea of a standing w/c actually is fun now!

Horse therapy has also helped with my anxiety & my speech, so I look forward to how another year will help me!

An article about where I do horse therapy: http://hillcountryview.com/2016/08/the-magic-of-horses/

P.S. If the link works, I’ve added some new traditional scrapbook pages for Zach & Jessie’s albums.