Update

CLASS

BEEN TYPING A TON, JUST NOT HERE. A LOT GOING ON W/FAMILY, CHURCH, ETC.

TRYING 2 PREP 2 SOON TEACH THE GIRLS IN A SCRAP. CLASS—JESS ALREADY DABBLES (IT’S SO CUTE), BUT FIA ASKED 4 A SCRAPBOOK CLASS (SHE SHARES MY EXTREME LOVE 4 STICKERS, WHICH STARTED ME SCRAPBOOKING, & LOVES 2 LOOK AT ANY SCRAPBOOK ALBUM I MAKE, SO IT’S IN HER BLOOD 2!)

HAD FUN THIS AM. TURNED ON “THE LITTLE MERMAID” SOUNDTRACK, ATE GOLDFISH (I CAN FEED MYSELF, BUT IT GETS HARDER AS TIME GOES ON), & TALKED 2 THE GIRLS. WELL, MORE LISTENED REALLY, AS SONGS SPARKED MEMORIES FROM BACKSTAGE, ON THEIR RECENT NY TRIP.

NEAT THAT THEY SIGN WELL ENOUGGH THAT I CAN JUST SIT W/THEM (MY 5-YR OLD, FIA, KNOWS “JENNY-ESE,” BUT IF MK SHOWS HER TRUE ASL, SHE CAN BE CLUELESS! LOL)…I DID NO COMP. OR TV 4 AT LEAST AN HR. STRAIGHT!

THEN, AFTER THE MUSIC ENDED, WE PLAYED A GAME! I’M EXCITED NOW, 2 DO R SCRAPBOOK CLASS! IF I GET A HANCE, I’LL POST THE PG. I MADE 4 R CLASS, 2 LEARN FROM…THE GIRLS HAVE ALL THE PIECES, WHICH WE’LL IDENTIFY, LEARN HOW 2 USE, & CREATE A SIMILAR PG., B4 MAKING THEIR OWN PREPARED ALBUMS, USING WHAT THEY HAVE LEARNED…

Carlsbad Caverns

VISION

THERE’S OFTEN QUES. ABOUT MY SIGHT…IT’S ACTUALLY A LOADED QUES., INVOLVING MANY FACTORS, & CONSTANTLY CHANGINGAS I ADAPT 2 IT, BUT, ESSENTIALLY, YES, I C U. I C ALARMINGLY WELL. NOT AT ALL “NORMAL,” BUT I C W/DOUBLE VISION. I DON’T C 2 OF U, MY PUPILS JUST DON’T LINE UP. I TEND 2 C THINGS DISTORTED…IF I’M TIRED, SICK, WEAKER, ETC., MY EYE MUSCLES R WEAKER, & IT’S TOUGHER 2 C, BUT I STILL C U.

I C AS IF I’M ON A CRUISE SHIP ALL DAY: MY EYES BOUNCE…MY LEFT EYE SEES BETTER, BUT IS WAY MORE LIGHT SENSITIVE (DAYLIGHT MAKES IT CLOSE) & REALLY WIGGLES. MY RT. EYE WIGGLES 2, BUT I TRY 2 WAIT 4 THE SPLIT SEC. THEY WIGGLE 2GETHER, OR MAKE THE IMAGE THAT I C W/MY RT. EYE, BE THE MORE DOMINANT IMAGE, SINCE IT’S STEADIER—WHICH ONLY WORKS, IF I LOOK STRAIGHT AHEAD.

I DON’T HAVE MUCH HORIZONTAL EYE MOVT. (VERY LITTLE IN MY RT. EYE), & MY HEAD CAN’T TURN VERY FAR 2 THE RT., SO, OFTEN, I IDENTIFY PEOPLE BY THE SOUND OF THEIR VOICE, CLOTHES I KNOW U R WEARING, OR BY HAIR (JESS WANTS SHORT HAIR, BUT HAS OPTED 2 KEEP IT LONG, SO I CAN EASILY FIND HER–THOUGH I’VE TOLD HER THAT SHE & ZACH STAND OUT, REGARDLESS OF HAIR LENGTH, SINCE THEIR HAIR IS SO LIGHT).

ANYWAY, IT’S NOT THAT I CAN’T READ SMALL FONT, IT’S THAT IT’S EXTREMELY HARDER (ESP. IF IT’S LONG) & TAKES TONS LONGER, BECAUSE MY EYES JUMP ALL OVER, SO I HAVE 2 KEEP FINDING MY PLACE…W/A LARGER LETTER, MY EYES JUMP, & I STAY SORTA’ IN PLACE. AFTER READING A FEW LETTERS, I GUESS THE WORD (AS MOST DO WHEN I FINGERSPELL, I GUESS THE WORD I’M READING).

TYPING CAN BE ROUGH, AS I’VE NEEDED 2 MEMORIZE THE KEYBOARD SOMEWHAT, & REALLY CONCENTRATE ON THE KEYS, SINCE I CAN’T GLANCE AT A KEY.

HOWEVER, UNLESS IT IS LARGE&/OR CLOSE, OFTEN I CAN’T C FACIAL EXPRESSIONS, UNLESS I KNOW U WELL ENOUGH 4 MY VISUAL MEMORY 2 “FILL IN” A GUESSED FACIAL EXPRESSION. IF I’M AT THE LAST PEW, IN THE CHAPEL AT CHURCH, I CAN C MY PEW. FARTHER AHEAD, THE PULPIT, I C SOME1 IS THERE. IF I KNOW THEM, CHANCES R THAT I CAN IDENTIFY THEM BY THEIR VOICE, CLOTHES, &/OR HAIR. THEN, AMAZING THINGS CAN HAPPEN…MY VISUAL MEMORY RECALLS THEM, & I CAN BE “TRICKED” 2 C THEM!

OBVIOUSLY, THIS VISUAL MEMORY HELPS ME ALSO READ, NAVIGATE THE INTERNET, & FILL IN ANY GAPS W/THINGS THAT I C UP CLOSE. THIS MAKES FAMILY FASTER 2 C, BECAUSE OF VISUAL MEMORY…ALSO EXPLAINS WHY I COULD C SOMETHING A MILLION TIMES IN A CROWD, BUT HAVE NO CLUE IT’S THERE, IF I HAVEN’T SEEN IT CLOSE, & MADE A VISUAL MEMORY OF IT.

THE ONLY TIME I”M UNSURE WHAT I C, DEPENDS ON LIGHTING…LIKE A CAMERA, IF LIGHT IS BEHIND U, U GET DARK. MORE LIGHT, MAKES U DARKER. I C U THERE–U R JUST DARK!

IT’S ME!

HAD INTERNET TROUBLE FOR 3 WEEKS, & ABSOLUTELY NO INTERNET FOR ALMOST 2 WEEKS…SEEMS SOMEWHAT BETTER NOW, BUT AM SLOWLY ANSWERING ALMOST 200 MESSAGES! GOT RID OF THE EASY 1’S, & AM PROUD 2 BE AT ABOUT 100 NOW! FROM HERE ON OUT, IT’S A SLOW PROCESS, AS I TYPE W/1 FINGER.

I’M TAKING MUSIC THERAPY THOUGH, & WOULD U BELIEVE THAT AS I PLAY PIANO FASTER (MY TEMPO STARTED AROUND 55, & IS NOW 72), IT TRANSLATES 2 TYPING FASTER?!?

MEANWHILE, I’D USE THE COMP. SET UP 4 ME, AT MY PARENTS HOUSE, 2 GET INTERNET, ON OCCASSION…BUT EVEN THAT’S BEEN IF-Y, SINCE MOM’S ALSO HAVING INTERNET TROUBLE!

BEEN NICE IN WAYS—RECONNECTING W/FAM., & CAN’T BEGIN 2 MENTION HOW STRESSED I FEEL, BY MY HALF-WRITTEN, SAVED, UNSENT EMAI’S. I GOT STRESSED JUST SORTING THEM! BUT, IN SOME WAYS I WANT 2 DRASTICALLY CHANGE. THERE WERE TIMES I WAS ACTUALLY HAPPIER. SO, BEAR W/ME, AS I ATTEMPT 2 CHANNEL THINGS DIFF.

BUT, IT STANK 2 HAVE NO “PHONE” & WAY 2 CONTACT OTHERS (I HAD TIMES WHEN I JUST NEEDED 2 TALK 2 A FRIEND, BUT WAS COMPLETELY ISOLATED—IT WAS SO PAINFUL 2 HAVE NO WAY 2 REACH OUT 2 ANY1).

IF I NEEDED 2, I WROTE AN EMAIL AT HOME ON A WORD DOCUMENT, ALSO LISTING THE EMAIL ADDRESS & SUBJECT, BURNED IT 2 A CD, WHICH MY MOM OR I COULD COPY & PASTE, 2 SEND AN EMAIL.

NOW, MK BUILT ME A NEW COMP., WHICH ARRIVED THURSDAY…NOT SURE WHEN I I’LL BE AVAILABLE 4 ANYTHING RT. NOW!

SO, SOME FOOD 4 THOUGHT:

• “No pain that we suffer, no trial that we experience is wasted. It
ministers to our education, to the development of such qualities as
patience, faith, fortitude, and humility. All that we suffer and all that we
endure, especially when we endure it patiently, builds up our
characters, purifies our hearts, expands our souls, and makes us more tender and
charitable, more worthy to be called the children of God. . . .and it
is through sorrow and suffering, toil and tribulation, that we gain the
education that we come here to acquire and which will make us more like
our Father and Mother in heaven. . . “–Orson F. Whitney in Faith Proceeds the Miracle by Spencer W. Kimball.L,
p. 98.
• WE SHOULD NOT COMPARE R SUFFERINGS W/THE SUFFERINGS OF ANOTHER.—MY YAHOO STROKE GROUP
• Focus on your abilities, not your disability. When I am so self absorbed and worried about me, my life falls apart, but when I am focusing on helping another I don’t have time to worry about me. .—MY YAHOO STROKE GROUP

BAGEL

THERE IS AN ILLNESS THAT’S CIRCULATED MY ENTIRE FAMILY. I FEEL IT STARTING. IF I CAN FORCE MYSELF 2 REST, I MAY BEAT IT, BUT IT’S SO UNLIKE ME 2 REST! SO, I’M DETERMINED 2 POST B4 IT HITS!

NOTHING HAS REALLY SEEMED SIGNIFICANT 2 POST, BUT MAYBE U’D FIND INTEREST THAT ABOUT A WEEK AGO, I HAD MY 1ST BAGEL, IN 4 YEARS! &, EVEN BETTER, AFTER THE INTIAL TASTE, I FED IT 2 MYSELF (THE CREAM CHEESE IS IN A ROLLED-UP BAGEL, SO IT IS MESS-FREE).

FEEDING MYSELF IS NOTHING NEW: I DID IT AWHILE BACK…BUT I HATED IT—MORE FOOD WAS ON ME, THAN IN ME. THE WRIST STRENGTH & CORDINATION R , SO NOW, I LOVE FEEDING MYSELF!

HAD A BAGEL AGAIN 2DAY, BUT I GET WEAK WHEN I DON’T FEEL GREAT, SO IT WAS SOOO HARD 2 EVEN LIFT MY WRIST!

DINNER

JUST A NOTE, BECCAUSE I DID 1 OF THE COOLEST THINGS EVER, ON WED. NIGHT—USING MY ARM SUPPORT & FINGER FOODS FROM ARBY'S, I FED MYSELF DINNER! BUT WAIT! THAT'S NOT ALL! I DRANK WATER 2, USING MY NEW CUP W/A STRAW! HOW COOL IS THAT?!?

GRANTED, I HAVEN'T MASTERED THE STRAW, & CAN CHOLE IF I GET A BIG GULP, ESP. SINCE I TILT MY CHAIR, ESP. 4 FLUIDS, BUT HEY, IT'S A START!

SO EXCITED!