A few days ago, I just wanted something to listen to, so I turned on a podcast I like. (Better Than Happy). I heard the title of the podcast (Managing Depression with EmyLee McIntyre). I didn’t think it’d apply to me because I’m not currently depressed. But oh, how wrong I was! 18 years ago, I was VERY depressed, & the podcast applied so well to my 18th stroke-a-versary (which is today, 3/16)! First thing to catch my attention was this gem of a conversation:
You create happiness cause you’ve been through hard things & you’re still ok…
We don’t have to dislike who we were in the past to become a different version of ourselves… “But I liked her! I still want to be her!” Ok. You can like her AND become an even better version of yourself.
(because) She’s you!
Then they shared this cool idea:
“Write down a thought u want to have & each day write down 3 evidences of how u saw it was true” (for example, if you are having trouble believing that God Loves u, write down “God loves me” & each day find 3 reasons why that is true)
What a fantastic idea! I don’t need to prove to myself that God loves me – these past 18 years have been filled with reminders of how God loves me & has stayed by my side these many years. But for fun (& because it has been on my mind), I will list 10 I have seen recently – though there have been many, many more!
- Because of choices He has prompted, I believe it helped me to have a quick encounter with COVID (though I’m still recovering, I feel great & well cared for)
- My husband was sick before me, so he could help me when I was too weak to do anything
- I am always amazed at the physical strength of my husband when he’s ill, & knowing how weak I got, there’s no doubt in my mind that he received heavenly assistance!
- My helper was also sick slightly before us, so she has also been here & could help me both when Mark was sick, & while I am sick!
- By some miracle, I didn’t get sick with COVID until my helper AND Mark were both well enough to help me, but it was close enough to when they had COVID that they could feel confident about their antibodies
- I saw my grandbaby just the day before we had to quarantine
- In 2020, I finally had surgery (that I’d put off forever) on my deviated septum…it has TOTALLY helped me deal with COVID
- Not too long ago, my husband picked up Navage (which basically sucks your boogers out – Ha, Ha). Not to sound like a commercial, but it has helped me SOOOO much! I’m less congested than I’ve ever been from a common cold!
- Years ago, it seemed like a mean, cruel trick how my diet had to suddenly change, but now all I see is how it blesses me! The week before I had COVID, my diet was jam-packed with anti-inflammatory foods! Stuff I never would’ve eaten 18 years ago! It was like I was being prepared for a battle! … & the clincher: it wasn’t even planned! (which is strange, since I’m a planner!)
- Recently, I was reading an article called “The Joy of the Saints” (https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/general-conference/2019/10/14christofferson?lang=eng), & I was reminded of a man who had a lot of influence in my life during the early years after my stroke. The article read, “ Once in an interview, Jack observed: “Problems will come into all of our lives; it’s part of just being here upon this earth. And some people think that religion or having faith in God will protect you from bad things. I don’t think that’s the point. I think the point is that if our faith is strong, that when bad things happen, which they will, we’ll be able to deal with them. … My faith never wavered, but that didn’t mean that I didn’t have depressions. I think for the first time in my life, I was pushed to the limit, and literally there was nowhere to turn, and so I turned to the Lord, and to this day, I feel a spontaneity of joy.”
Now I should pick a phrase I want to believe, but am having trouble believing…