A quick recap of the last 3 or 4 months:
1. Sophia married Davis Wycherly in October in the Jordan River Temple (though it mostly just meant more travel – my awesome S-I-L, Margot-Mark’s “big” sister–by 1 year, was the most awesome wedding planner!)
2. I had my first primary program in October, & I have now been the primary president for a year. Being the primary president at church is crazy busy from September (when I finish writing the primary program) until January (when I’m finished organizing for the new year). But I love it! It makes me so happy to feel like I still have something to contribute!
3. We went on a cruise during thanksgiving. It was great if u are vaccinated & go w/o the kids. They have the non-vaccinated & vaccinated sections, so u can go w/o a mask sometimes. It was also very uncrowded.
4. Jessie just got engaged & will be married in June in the Timpanogus temple to Kyle Van Roosendaal. All 3 of my kids married within TWO years…crazy!
5. Zach, & his wife, Maddie, had my first grandbaby, James, in December, & they just moved to Texas! (Yes, I’m a grandma! I’m not a fan of the word “grandma” though … my mom is “grandma” & she’s really old! Haha – love u mom!)
Prior to my stroke, I was a “Pintrest mom”. I threw amazing birthday parties (I’d taken a cake decorating class so my cakes would be amazing, & I went all out, like making Superman shirts w/capes, or balloon light sabers), made file folder games (thanks to my Elementary Education background), etc.
After my stroke, I had a really hard time re-defining the word “mother”. If u know the enneagram, I’m a 3, & I define that word by what I do. All of my “best mom” identity was stripped away with my stroke. It was so tough for me, but Mark says my stroke made me a better mom…the kids didn’t care about all of that! they were happier just having me there to cover with stickers, watch a puppet show, or to play our improvised version of hide-&-go-seek!
I don’t think I learned from it though, cuz I’m facing the same issues as a grandma! I think I’m facing the “Pintrest grandma”. I seem to define that word by what I do, as well, & my OCD-personality only makes it worse, because I don’t “do” what I “think” I should do. To me, a grandma helps mom, possibly by take care of the kids, & does stuff like bake cookies. I do neither. So, I’m working on re-defining that word now. In the beginning last time, I felt so useless until I discovered unique ways to still be a mom. Hopefully I’ll learn faster this time! I’m sure it will help having him live closer!
I know for my grandkids, what they love me to do the most is just LISTEN to them. They can babble on and on and Grandma patiently listens, something mothers may not always have the time to do. They love looking through books with me, and it is SO fun when they learn to read and they read to you. My grandchildren will tell me these long stories with all the hand motions and all the exasperations they are having trying to deal with earth life. Trust me, they need your ears more than your hands.
thank u so much! this means alot!
Congratulations on becoming a grandma! So happy for you. Best thing in the world. We are also thrilled about Jess being engaged! Love that girl! What a lucky young man!
As always thank you for your thoughts.