WENT 2 DALLAS & OKLAMOMA LAST SUN. 2 WED., & IT’S BEEN CRAZY BUSY EVER SINCE. 2 BAD IT’S COMPOUNED BY MY DOUBLE VISION (WHICH ONLY WORSENS W/O FOCUSING 2 READ), BEING SLOW, & TYPING W/1 FINGER.

MON., 3-16, I “CELEBRATED” MY “STOKE-AVERSARY.” It was 5 yrs, ago, & they said I would die – WRONG!
They said I would never move again — WRONG! NOT ONLY DOES MY HEAD & MY RT. ARM MOVE, BUT I CAN LIFT MY LEGS, BEND FWD, PLAY SOME INSTRUMENTS, & IF HELD RT., I CAN EVEN WALK!
They were not sure if I would swallow or talk – WRONG! I CAN EVEN SUCK A STRAW, BITE A LITTLE, & FEED MYSELF!
I ONLY SAY A FEW WORDS, BUT AM GETTING BETTER.

I DON’T SUGGEST LISTENING 2 ANY DOCTOR OR THERAPIST ABOUT THE TIME 2 RECOVER. THEIR JOB IS 2 PREPARE U 4 THE WORST OUTCOME POSS., & MINE WAS DYING, OR NEVER MOVING OR TALKING AGAIN (JUST BLINKING) …

I WAS TOLD THAT IN THE 1ST 9 MO., I’D RECOVER THE MOST THAT I’D GET BACK, OF WHATEVER I’D NOW BE CAPABLE OF. HOW I DREADED THAT 9 MO. MARKER, & AT 9 MO. POST STROKE, I COULD DO EXTREMELY LITTLE! HECK, I COULDN’T MOVE EVEN A MUSCLE 4 LIKE 5 MO.!

IT’S A VERY SLOW RECOVERY–I EXPECTED 2 BE UP & DOING MY KID’S LAUNDRY IN 1 YR.–& I’M STILL WAITING 2 BE UP. BUT I AM WAITING. SOMEDAY, I HOPE 2 MAKE THE MANY PRAYERS & WISHES 2 SANTA, IN MY BEHALF, COME TRUE! I HAVE A DREAM 2 JUST WALK ENOUGH, 2 BE ABLE 2 DO THINGS LIKE POTTY MYSELF! LOL

SO GLAD I REFUSED 2 BELIEVE THAT MY RECOVERY TIME WAS UP AFTER 9 MO.! I CAN DO SOOO MUCH MORE!

THE HARDEST PART HAS PASSED……I LIVED. I’M NOT JUMPING FOR JOY CAUSE THIS HAPPENED, BUT AM THANKFUL IT HAPPENED AT THE AGE I WAS. BEING YOUNG HELPS…DOUBT I’D BE AS MOTIVATED IN MY RECOVERY, IF I WAS 85 YRS., VS. 35 YRS.! PLUS, MY KIDS WERE AT A GOOD AGE—I WOULDN’T WANT FIA ANY YOUNGER THAN SHE WAS (BARELY 2 YRS.) WHEN I HAD MY STROKE, BUT IT HAS BEEN A BENEFIT 2 HAVE HER GROW UP IN MY RECOVERY. IN FACT, ACCORDING 2 FIA, WHO HAS AN ENORMOUS LIST OF FUTURE CAREERS, I HAVE A JOB I’M PERFECT 4: A MOM!
INTERESTING FACT: ZACH WAS ALMOST FIA’S AGE (ALMOST 7 YRS. OLD), WHEN I HAD MY STROKE.

I’VE COME SO FAR IN 5 YRS. & IT ONLY KEEPS GETTING BETTER.
COULD HAVE BEEN MUCH WORSE.

A STROKE SURVIVOR, Perry Stevens (http://www.lighthousebeam.com/giftbook.html) recently said:
“(I was told) ‘Never look how far you have to go!. Just look how far you have come.’ (That) really struck me. I
was just unresponsive laying in a bed with many tubes doing things for me (that)I
could not do myself. Now I am living at home and doing well, actually better
everyday, even after eight years my speech keeps getting better. With God on
my side there is no way I will quit trying to keep doing better in all that
I do.”

GOT BACK FROM MY TRIP SAT.– WE WERE AT DISNEYLAND. SORRY 4 THE DELAY– I GOT SICK ON R TRIP, & HAVE BEEN RE-COOPERATING.

WED., WE PICKED UP THE GIRLS FROM SCHOOL, & HEADED 2 MY MOM’S. THEY WERE EXCITED THEY WERE SLEEPING THERE, BUT FIA WAS TOLD SHE’D STAY W/MOM & DAD. SHE THOUGHT THAT WAS AWESOME, 2 HAVE MOM & DAD 2 HERSELF, BUT HAD NO IDEA HOW AWESOME IT WAS! FIA’S B-DAY WAS THE FOLLOWING DAY, SO JESS GUESSED FIA WAS GOING 2 A SPECIAL DINNER. A SPECIAL DINNER, INDEED!

EACH KID IS GETTING A SPECIAL TRIP THIS YEAR—JESS ALREADY WENT ON HERS, & ZACH KNOWS HIS IS COMING UP, BUT FIA KNEW NOTHING OF HERS, EXCEPT THAT I WAS GOING 2…

WE HAVEN’T FLOWN IN YEARS (IT JUST ISN’T CONDUSIVE 2 ME), SO HER 1ST SURPRISE WAS THE AIRPORT! THE PREVIOUS FLIGHT (NEW YORK) WAS LISTED STILL—IT’S WHERE MY SISTER LIVES, & JESS JUST WENT THERE, SO IT WAS LOGICAL 2 THINK WE WERE GOING THERE, BUT WE FILLED HER IN THAT WE WERE FLYING 2 CALIFORNIA, & DRIVING 2 R HOTEL. WE GOT ALL THE WAY 2 THE HOTEL, B4 SHE FIGURED OUT WHERE WE WERE (SHE SAW A SIGN POINTING THE WAY 2 DISNEYLAND)!

AT DISNEYLAND, I DIDN’T GET AS MUCH PRACTICE TIME, AS I’D HAVE LIKED IN my new MANUAL W/C. B4 I LEFT, THE KIDS USED IT, & HAD A BLAST IN IT. I ENJOYED HAVING THEM C HOW OFTEN THEY LEFT STUFF ON THE FLOOR, IN THE WAY (NOW, IF ONLY THEY COULDN’T TALK, & DEMAND SOME1 2 MOVE IT)! THEY ENJOYED ROLLING AROUND, WATCHING TV, DEMANDING 2 BE FED, & LAUGHING OR MAKING NOISES LIKE I DO, & “BEING MOM.”

IF I WAS ALONE AT THE DISNEYLAND PARK, THE W/C BREAK WAS USED, & I DIDN’T ARGUE, BECAUSE IT WAS 4 MY OWN SAFETY–I’M RT. HANDED, & CAN’T TURN YET, OR BACK OUT OF ANY1’S WAY, OR DO MUCH, IF I ROLL INTO A CROWD!

I’M USUALLY IN A POWER CHAIR, & LOVE IT. IF IT BREAKS, I HATE 2 GO BACK 2 MY MANUAL, BUT WE HAD 1 W/ALL SMALL WHEELS FOR THE 1ST 9 MO., AFTER MY STROKE, SO IF MY POWER W/C BROKE, I HAD NO CHOICE BUT 2 RETURN 2 MY MANUAL W/C W/SMALL WHEELS, & BE AT THE COMPLETE MERCY OF OTHERS!

MY NEW MANUAL THAT WE TOOK, W/BIG WHEELS I CAN MANUEVER, I CRIED TEARS OF JOY WHEN I GOT IT, AT THE MERE THOUGHT OF THE CAPABILITY 2 MOVE ON TRIPS, EVEN THOUGH I WASN’T SURE I COULD EVEN MOVE IT! (& I CAN BARELY DO IT–I MOSTLY GO IN A HUGE FWD LEFT-HAND TURN… ODDLY, I PUSH A LOT BETTER ON THE ACTUAL WHEEL, THAN ON THE RAIL, UNTIL I’M STRONGER, & I HAVE 2 MOVE FAST, OR I JUST ROLL BACK FROM WHERE I CAME!)

AS MANY STROKE SURVIVORS KNNOW, HELP IS HARD TO ACCEPT AFTER GAINING SOME INDEPENDENCE WITH A POWER CHAIR. I’VE DECIDED IT’S ANOTHER ONE OF THOSE STAGES IN RECOVERY WE MUST FACE.

I FINGERSPELL, & IT’S TIRING 2 SIGN ALL THAT I DO, SO I WAS BEYOND EXHASTED WHEN WE RETURNED HOME! IT’S ALARMING HOW INCREDIBLY INDEPENDENT I’VE BECOME, BECAUSE OF THE HOME ACCESSIBILITY, & MY POWER W/C!

I DETEST MY MANUAL CHAIR THAT HAS SMALL WHEELS, WHERE I GO BACK 2 BEING COMPLETELY HELPLESS & DEPENDANT. IT HAD IT’S TIME, BUT I HAVE SO OUTGROWN IT! I REMEMBER LOOKING AT MY OLD MANUAL CHAIR, WATCHING MY HUSBAND, MARK, REMOVE PARTS I’D OUTGROWN, & I VOWED 2 GET RID OF MORE! LAST SUMMER, IN A HOTEL ROOM, I SAW HOW VITAL IT IS 4 ME 2 MOVE (ESP. SINCE I CAN’T SPEAK), BUT MANY TRAVELS—ESP. WHERE FLYING IS CONCERNNED–POWER CHAIRS R NOT AN OPTION, SO I’M ANXIOUS 2 MAKE THIS WORK! I FIGURE I CAN ONLY DO SO MUCH, BUT I CAN AT LEAST TRY!

I AM SO EXCITED! http://www.readthescriptures.com/ IS SUCH AN AWESOME THING! EXCEPT WHEN I TRAVEL, I CHECK EMAIL DAILY. I HAVE BEEN TRYING 2 READ THE SCRIPTURES DAILY & THE RS & SS LESSON WEEKLY, VIA AUDIO AT LDS.ORG, BUT I’VE DONE HORRIBLE–EXCEPT W/THE RS LESSON, BECAUSE IT’S EMAILED 2 ME!

THIS LET’S ME READ ALL THOSE THINGS VIA AUDIO THROUGH EMAIL REMINDERS, OR ONLINE (WHERE THERE’S AUDIO, AS WELL AS ENLARGED TEXT, AS WELL AS THE CAPABILITY 2 WRITE NOTES, & HIGHLIGHT TEXT)! I CAN PICK WHERE 2 START, WHEN 2 STOP, ETC. THEY SEEM 2 HAVE COVERED EVERYTHING!

THE 1ST DAY THAT I WAS CONCIOUS IN THE CLEVELAND HOSPITAL, I WONDERED HOW I COULD READ THE SCRIPTURES AGAIN. IT HAS BEEN A CONCERN 4 ALMOST 5 YRS., AS I’VE BEEN TOLD I SHOULD READ THEM DAILY. SO IMAGINE MY EXCITEMENT IN FINDING THIS WEBSITE!! I WANT 2 TELL EVERY1 ABOUT THIS GREAT RESOURCE!

KNOW WHAT ELSE? I ONLY LEARNED ABOUT IT BECAUSE OF THE PROGRAM (READ PLEASE) THAT I MENTIONED IN THE LAST ENTRY ON MY BLOG! NORMALLY, I’D HAVE SKIPPED THE ARTICLE, OR WAITED MONTHS 4 IT 2 BE READ 2 ME!

IT’S A GOOD SIGN THAT I HAVEN’T POSTED…HAVE A LOT WAITING, BUT IT’S DIFFICULT 2 FIND THE TIME—I HAVEN’T MASTERED THE NEW BALANCE (I’M SLOWER & NEED MORE TYPING TIME, BUT ENJOY FAMILY TIME MORE–ESP. SINCE I CAN TALK 2 EVERY1, NOW).

I USUALLY TAKE PARTS OF THINGS I’VE WRITTEN (IN EMAILS, MY JOURNAL, MY COMMENTS 4 CHURCH, ETC.) 2 HELP TYPE A POST (HELPS MANAGE TIME), BUT DOESN’T HELP IF MY EMAIL IS 2 PERSONAL, OR DISCIPLING A KID, & I’M NOT FINDING TIME 2 TYPE MY JOURNAL, ETC.

SO, HERE’S FOOD 4 THOUGHT. These quotes will give you energy to try a little harder or just keep at it, to help you remember why you’re here and who you want to become:

You are the only person on earth who can use your abilities.
-Zig Ziglar

Life is thickly sown with thorns, and I know no other remedy than to pass quickly through them. The longer we dwell on our misfortunes, the greater is their power to harm us.

-Voltaire
Courage does not always roar. Sometimes, it is the quiet voice at the
end of the day saying, “I will try again tomorrow”.
— Mary Anne Radmacher

“even if you feel that your dreams and goals have washed out in the past, build them up again. Each new day is a fresh start, a clean slate, a new chance to change, improve, and try again. In the very process lie opportunities immeasurable for growth and good fortune. “
“Music and the Spoken Word,” from “Beginning Again”

“We can be blessed with wisdom when we understand, in very personal ways, that on the other side of suffering is a depth of feeling, a perspective on life and love that we might not otherwise have known. :
“Music and the Spoken Word,” from “Unexpected Blessings”

“Every great endeavor starts small, sometimes as little more than a dream… But even small beginnings, after all of the roadblocks and the dead ends, can lead to great things when they ride on the wheels of a dream.”
“Music and the Spoken Word,” from “Big Dreams on a Small Island”: (http://www.musicandthespokenword.com/messages/):

I gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which I must stop and look fear in the face…I say to myself, I’ve lived through this and can take the next thing that comes along.

-Eleanor Roosevelt