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VACATION

ON 6/21-28 WE DROVE 2 UTAH, SPENT 3 DAYS, THEN WENT BACK 2 AUSTIN, TX. ABOUT A DRIVE VS. FLY-I ONLY LASTED THAT LONG IN UTAH-& 1 WEEK INCLUDED DRIVE TIME-BECAUSE I HAD COMPUTER & A LARGE SCREEN TV. DRIVING SUCKS THAT IT’S SLOWER, BUT IT’S WAY BETTER THAN FLYING 4 ME. FLYING IS JUST STRESSFUL, LIKE U CAN’T BELIEVE, & I’M SO WORRIED ABOUT A CANCELED FLIGHT. DRIVING ALSO ALLOWS ME MORE COMFORTS: LIKE MY VAN, POWER CHAIR, & RAMP. BUT, I COULD TELL WHEN THE KIDS GOT BORED-THEY GOT NOISY. BEFORE, I KEPT THEM QUIET & ENTERTAINED!

SO WHY DID WE GO? MARK’S BABY BROTHER’S WEDDING. IT WAS GOOD (ALTHOUGH W/PBA & PICS RT. AFTER, I ONLY DID 2 PICS AT THE RECEPTION, ATTENDED THE RECEPTION & PART OF THE FAM. DINNER THE PREVIOUS NIGHT) & WE GOT 2 C LOTS OF FAM., WHICH WAS GOOD!

ON THE WAY THERE, A MALLARD DUCK HIT THE WINDSHEILD (IT SEEMS FINE) DIRECTLY IN FRONT OF ME. MARK FELT BAD, BUT AFTER HOURS OF HIM POINTING OUT WILDLIFE I COULDN’T C, I COMMENTED, “WELL, AT LEAST I SAW THAT!”

SUN.WE HAD 4 VISITORS. I LATER TOLD THEM:

I PURPOSELY DIDN’T SEND A REMINDER EMAIL. I AM SHOCKED U REMEMBERED! I FIGURED MY PBA WOULD MAKE ME CRY HORRIBLY EVERYTIME I SAW SOME1. I DID AMAZINGLY WELL! I DIDN’T CRY! I THINK IT HELPED 2 C EXTENDED FAM. & ATTEND A WEDDING RECEPTION THE PREVIOUS DAY.

THERE WERE 2 MORE PEOPLE-1 OUT OF TOWN & 1 THAT I GOT THE EMAIL BACK. BUT 2 THEM, I SAY DON’T FEEL BAD-MARK’S PARENTS LIVE THERE, SO I’M SURE I’LL BE BACK! BESIDES, 4 PEOPLE CAME-MIRACUOSLY NO OVERLAPPING-FROM 2 PM ON, & I WAS EXHAUSTED! I COULDN’T HAVE HANDLED MORE VISITORS!

THINGS YOU MISSED

WELCOME TO MY NEWLY REDESIGNED SITE!

THIS IS MY FIRST POST IN MONTHS.

HERE IS WHAT YOU MISSED SINCE I’VE BEEN GONE:

I DISCOVERED I HAVE PBA, WHICH EXPLAINS WHY I CAN’T CONTROL MY LAUGHING/CRYING, & IF I HAVE AN EMOTION, IT’S AMPLIFIED. TEARS/LAUGHTER R NOT ALWAYS PROPORTIONAL 2 HOW I FEEL. PBA IS A HUGE PART OF MY DAILY LIFE & INTERFERES W/SOOO MUCH! PEOPLE THINK THEY UNDERSTAND IT, BUT EVEN I CAN’T UNDERSTAND IT!

GUESS WHAT I DID THAT WAS SO COOL! I WAS LOOKING AT A BOOK JESSIE MADE AT SCHOOL ON THE ELEVATOR. IT DROPPED, BUT THE ELVATOR WALL MADE IT STOP AT MY FOOT, & I BENT OVER & PICKED IT UP! I WAS SOOO PROUD! I HAVE STARTED BENDING ON THE ELEVATOR-4 SOME REASON IT’S EASIER-2 FIX THE BOTTOMS OF MY CAPRIS & MY SOCKS…

I BEGAN MUSIC THERAPY, & WAS ASKED:

How is therapy?

WELL, I SAID A CLEAR “HI” 2 MY MOM. I ALWAYS TRY, BUT 4 THE 1ST TIME IT WAS RECOGNIZED & IDENTIFIED, THANKS 2 MUSIC THERAPY. I CAN’T SAY IT ON COMMAND, BUT SOMETIMES THAT & “UH-HUH” POP OUT. IT’S EXCITING, & I TRY NOT 2 CRY FROM EXCITEMENT!

LAST POST ?

THIS MAY BE MY LAST POST ON MY WEBSITE? MY POSTS NEED 2 BE CLOSED IN A TIME FRAME, WHICH I DON?T KNOW HOW 2 DO, OR PORN IS POSTED 2 THE COMMENTS. EVERY COMMENT IS SENT 2 ME. SINCE MY INBOX WAS BEING FILLED W/ABOUT 20 PORN EMAILS DAILY, I HAVE HAD ALL COMMENTS SENT 2 MY SPAM FOLDER WHERE I CAN IGNORE THEM-SO I MOST LIKELY WILL NOT C ANY COMMENTS-I HAVE 2 BE EMAILED PERSONALLY-SO DON?T EXPECT A RESPONSE 2 ANY COMMENT U POST. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING-THIS IS A LAST RESORT. I DON?T WANT TO BE HELD RESPONSIBLE 4 HOW THINGS MAY END.

ON A POSITIVE NOTE, I PUT SOME STUFF 4 U ON SNAPFISH.COM 2 VIEW. I HAVE NEVER USED SNAPFISH BEFORE, BUT IF U USE THIS LINK , U SHOULD GET SCRAPBOOK PAGES I HAVE TRIED 2 POST SINCE LAST SUMMER, RECENT PICS OF KIDS AT JESS? B-DAY 2/4-YES, MARK MADE THE CAKE, & R HOUSE.

LEFT EYE

SUNDAY WHEN I WOKE, IT FELT LIKE I HAD EYE BOOGERS OR SAND IN MY LEFT EYE, BUT I WAS 2 WEAK 2 REACH MY EYE. MARK & A FRIEND AT CHURCH ASKED ME IF I WAS OK-MY EYE WAS ALL RED. I FELT FINE, BUT AT THE EBD OF CHURCH (3 HOURS), I WAS STRUGGLING 2 KEEP MY LEFT EYE OPEN. MARK TOOK OUT MY CONTACTS, & I WAS REMINDED WHY, 4 MANY REASONS, I HATE GLASSES SO MUCH. BY THE TIME MY FRIEND VISITED, I COULD BARE;Y OPEN MY EYE, SO EVEN THOUGH I USUALLY REFUSED OTHERS PRESCRIPTION MEDS & MARK HAD GIVEN ME ALLERGY MEDS (WHICH I FELT WAS PART OF MY PROB.), SOMETHING MORE WAS WRONG. AFTER MY FRIEND REASSURED ME HER PRESCRIPTION MEDS 4 PINK EYE WAS CLEAN, I HAD HER GIVE ME SOME. IT FELT A LITTLE BETTER, BUT A COUPLE HOURS LATER AT MY PARENT’S HOUSE, IT KILLED 2 OPEN MY EYE. SINCE I COULDN’T OPEN 1 EYE ALONE, THERE I SAT BY THE FRONT DOOR, UNMOVING & EYES CLOSED.

WHEN WE WENT HOME EARLY, I HAD 2 SOMEHOW TYPE & SEND SOME EMAILS BY MON. (I HAVE 20+ EMAILS-SOME FROM 12/20 & ABOUT 5 JOURNAL ENTRIES W/REMINDER NOTES 2 FILL IN LATER, SO WHILE I’M SWAMPED, THESE HAD 2 BE DONE THAT NIGHT) SO AFTER SOME MEDS, I LET MY EYE REST SOME, THEN MANAGED 2 OPEN MY RT. EYE & SLOWLY GO FROM MY ROOM, DOWN AN ELEVATOR (WHICH I CAN DO ALONE NOW!), 2 MY COMP. & TYPE THOSE EMAILS. ALL WAS DONE W/MY LEFT EYE CLOSED & WATERING, MY RT. EYE OPEN. IT MADE ME SO SICK 2 MY TUMMY, I WAS SURE I WOULD THROW-UP & WROTE A HURRIED LAST EMAIL, THEN WENT 2 BED AROUND 9:40. I DIDN’T SLEEP AT ALL. IT HURT SO BAD-MY EYE WATERED & IT FELT LIKE DAGGERS IN MY EYE. U WOULD THINK THIS WAS A CAKEWALK AFTER MY GUTS WERE PULLED OUT REMOVING THE FEEDING TUBE & BEING AWAKE WHEN I WAS CUT OPEN 4 A SURGERY, BUT THE PAIN WAS DIFF.

MON. I SAW A DOCTOR, & PAIN IS AGAIN BEARABLE & I CAN OPEN MY EYE SOME, THOUGH IT IS HARD 2 SEE RT. & TYPING/READING IS SLOWER.

FAMILY REUNION

I CAN’T BELIEVE I’M SAYING THIS, BUT AT R FAMILY REUNION SEEING MY GRANDMA W/HER CARETAKER REMINDED ME WHY I HATE THEM SO MUCH! SHE FREAKIN’ CUT HER MEAT! SHE TREATED MY GRANDMA & ME LIKE BABIES & HER LIFE WAS GRANDMAS, SO GRANDMA WAS NEVER ALONE. SHE MAY LIKE IT, BUT IT BUGS ME 2 DEATH!

I USED 2 CLEAN-UP AFTER KIDS R IN BED, NOW I THINK MARK C’S WHY! IT ALSO MADE ME MAD IF I CCLEANED WHILE HE SAT & WATCHED TV-I WOULD DRIVE ME NUTS! I FEEL SOOO BBAD I CAN’T HELP!