I conquered Mount Everest! Well, not really…recently I rode “Expedition Everest” at Disney World. For my 20th Anniversary, we spent 1 ½ amazing days at DisneyWorld, then went on a Disney Cruise again—Disney just knows how to treat someone in a w/c!
On our trip, I had little therapy, so when I went horseback riding after our trip, I had trouble sitting up, & it wasn’t until the lesson was 1/2-way done, that my body seemed to remember what to do! I collapsed when I got off the horse, & had to tilt my chair back, cuz I was too tired to even sit up. Lol
This month has been quite busy (hence, I haven’t posted in FOREVER!), & has brought with it a desire to make some changes in my life. A few weeks ago, I felt MISERABLE, but I recognized that Satan has been using the same “door” for years to enter my life, & changes were necessary to “strengthen” me, so I didn’t keep letting him into my life. I am grateful that I have someone in my life who keeps giving me chances as I figure things out, & not giving up on me! As I thought about things,I realized that at times, we can do all we think we can do, & even involve God in the plans we have for our own lives, but sometimes we just need to surrender to God, & let God take care of things his way.
C.S. Lewis said “Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and so on: you knew that those jobs needed doing and so you are not surprised. But presently he starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably and does not seem to make sense. What on earth is He up to? The explanation is that He is building quite a different house from the one you thought of—throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards. You thought you were going to be made into a decent little cottage: but He is building a palace.”
I heard this quote a few years ago, & it seemed so fitting for my life after my stroke, but it has recently re-entered my mind, & I’m seeing that in order for God to build His palace, I need to “relinquish the reins.” This is very hard for me, as I am a control-freak who already has lost so much control of my life. (Though it can be argued that it should be easier for me to give up control in my life!) However, in surrendering to God, I am not losing control—I am actually gaining control by helping make the decisions as my “palace” is built.
I know you can’t always see it in yourself, but Heavenly Father is indeed turning your cottage into a palatial estate. You have gained such spiritual insight, spiritual maturity, and wisdom through this enormous trial, but it is obvious that He slowed down your body to let you work on your brain and your spirit! You are amazing, and you are such an inspiration to so many. Keep posting as often as you can. Hugs!