STROKE-AVERSARY

IT'S MY 4TH STROKE-AVERSARY: IN OTHER WORDS, IT'S BEEN 4 YRS. SINCE I STROKED. I WAS RECENTLY REMINDED OF THE 1ST YEAR AFTER I STROKED— BY FAR, THAT 1ST YEAR IS REALLY A STRUGGLE, 4 EVERY1—NOT JUST ME. GLAD IT IS FAR PAST, & THAT I'VE SURVIVED LONG ENOUGH 2 OUTLIVE THE NIGHTMARE I WAS DAILY LIVING—

AFTER MY STROKE, I REALIZED THAT, .LIKE IT OR NOT, I WAS HERE THIS WAY, & MADE THE CHOICE 2 TRY 2 MOVE FWD & MAKE THE BEST OF IT. EVEN NOW, THERE R TOUGH DAYS, BUT NOW MY LIFE SEEMS WORTHWHILE & IT GIVES ME A WILL 2 KEEP LIVING (MOST LOCKED-IN DIE W/IN A YEAR OR 2—I BELIEVE FROM THE LACK OF FEELING THEIR LIFE IS WORTHWHILE. AS A WIFE & YOUNG MOTHER, & DUE 2 MY RELIGIOUS BELIEFS, I WAS CONSTANTLY REMINDED OF MY WORTH. NOW, I’M 4 YEARS POST-STROKE, SO I'VE HAD A CHANCE 2 CHANGE MY VIEWPOINT!)

MY FAITH HELPED TONS 2 CHANGE MY VIEWPOINT, SINCE FAMILIES R CONSIDERED SO IMPORTANT, & I BELIEVE THAT SOMEDAY THERE WILL BE A LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL, & MY BODY WILL AGAIN WORK. I MAY HAVE 2 DIE B4 THAT HAPPENS, & MY BODY WILL AGAIN WORK, BUT LIFE IS SHORT & I BELEIVE IT’S POSSIBLE, THROUGH CHRIST…THAT MAKES ME KEEP CHUGGING ALONG.

IN OCT., I “SPOKE" AT AN INTERNATIONAL DRS. CONFERENCE. A BIG QUES. WAS IF THEY SHOULD PULL THE PLUG 4 OTHERS LIKE ME…TOUGH 2 ANSWER, BECAUSE EVERY SITUATION IS SO DIFFERENT. I’VE NEVER EVER WANTED LIFE SUPPORT, BUT WHEN I STROKED, I WANTED THEM 2 DO ALL THEY COULD, AT THAT MOMENT.

THE 1ST 3 MONTHS, I COULD MOVE NOTHING, BUT MY EYELIDS, & LAID IN A BED. MY HUSBAND REALLY WAS A STRONG ADVOCATE & FOUGHT 4 ME & KNEW ME WELL ENOUGH 2 THINK, “JENNY WOULDN’T STAND 4 THAT!”

STILL, I HAD DAYS. IT CAN BE TOUGH PHYSICALLY & EMOTIONALLY. THOSE WHO CARE 4 ME, HAD 2 MAKE THE CHOICE WHETHER OR NOT I LIVED, BECAUSE IT ALSO MUST BE WEIGHED HOW MUCH U R WILLING 2 GIVE UP 4 THAT PERSON, IF THEY LIVE. NO DOCTOR CAN MAKE THAT CHOICE. THE STROKEE CAN'T MAKE THAT CHOICE. (BESIDES, THE ROAD IS SO ROCKY, I’M GLAD I DIDN’T DECIDE, OR, DEPENDING ON THE DAY, I WOULD’VE ANSWERED DIFFERENT!) I TOLD THE DOCTOR’S 2 LET FAMILY DECIDE, SINCE THEY NEED 2 WEIGH HOW THEIR LIVES WILL SERIOUSLY CHANGE.

3 comments

  1. Jen- I hope you got a cupcake yesterday for your anniversary! I remembered because Malorie’s birthday is the same day.

  2. Bless you Jenny!

    I always check your blog when I need an uplift. You never fail me.

    Love and hugs,
    Maddy

  3. Your decision to fight through this has blessed thousands of lives. Your children will be more meek, patient, non-judgmental and sympathetic because of your situation. They will love each other more and believe in the Plan of Salvation like no other. You’re doing such good things!

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